


Kili's Real-Life Fanfiction

by orphan_account



Series: Shippy Hobbit Stories [1]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Kili writes, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Sibling Incest, slight crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-10
Updated: 2015-05-10
Packaged: 2018-03-29 20:45:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3910048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kili makes fanfic off of his real life. Great! They're about his brother . . .</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kili's Real-Life Fanfiction

Kili had a problem.

“Hang it hang it hang it,” he chanted as he hopped around on one foot. How had kicking something sounded like a good idea? The pain faded and he slowly set his heal to the ground. He glared at the offending wall-trim.

It was not fazed.

With a sigh, he turned to his computer. Which was still logged on. And had one of his stories open.

He'd gone through it, and it didn't _look_ like anyone had read it. He just wasn't 100% sure he hadn't logged off. Fortunately, even if someone _had_ read it, it was his best written story so far, so it wouldn't burn their eyes—it would just horrify them. 

_“Look,” he whispered, “I **do** want to do it, I'm just . . .” his grip on my shirt tightened, “I'm just not ready yet.”_

_He looked up at me_ _nervously. “So, wait for me?”_

_“God Fee,” I whispered, “if you ask me like that, I'd do anything!” and I leaned down to steal a kiss._

Fee. Short for Fili. Extra-short of Philip. His brother.

Side-note, he'd never been able to pull off a slow burn before. He'd always wanted to get around to the banging part. He took a moment to wonder if that said something about him.

And then he went back into panic mode.

He scrolled through, finding no changes, then did it again, looking for typo fixes. This led him to wondering if he'd miss-spelled ‘hand’ in the steamy first kiss scene, or perhaps ‘map’ when they were talking about their future—and that led him to the angsting over whether they should live in England, Australia, or Canada. This, in turn, led him to the kitchen.

Angst needed food.

Fili was on the counter, shirtless, looking thoughtfully at his phone, and munching on some mini-Oreos. Health meant little to him.

_Wait, then how does he have a six-pack?_

Before Kili could pause to consider this logically, several scenarios presented themselves. All of which were hot and one of which made him jealous.

Hang it.

“Hungry?” Fili asked. He hadn't looked away from his phone.

_Does he realize how low his pants are?_

“Yeah. Mind sharing some of those with me?”

“Sure.”

Something was off. The very way he was sitting—it was something he did when he was feeling cocky or triumphant, but he was acting casually.

Kili took two Oreos and popped them in his mouth one at a time. Fili swiped right-to-left, still looking thoughtful. And then his eyes went huge.

“Oh my god,” he whispered.

“What?” Kili asked, taking a swig of milk.

“We didn't have sex?”

Kili spewed his milk. “WHAT?”

Fili jabbed at his screen. “Page two-hundred-and-thirty-five, I say no to sex.”

Yeah, yeah _in the fic_ he had. He hadn't been ready for it. He'd—

Wait, what?

“You're okay with it?”

“No,” and for a second Kili's heart stopped, “we should be having sex right now!”

There were too many things to think about. His brain short circuited.

He put his hands on either side of his brother and kissed him.


End file.
